January 4, 2020, Saturday. 2:43pm
Yesterday the Love of my life, my BFF and soul mate, my husband had thirty-five years clean. I can’t tell you how proud and grateful I am. He is truly a very good man. Not perfect, thank goodness, but next to my grandpa, the best man I’ve ever known. Jim and I spent about the last four years of our addiction together, and whew Whee, what a time of it it was! And this.. is the good.
January 9, 2020
I did not complete this blog that day, my life keeps getting in the way. Kids, dogs, jobs, sponsees and so on. I love that I have a full life and try to add meaning to my life and have my time on this earth count for something. Therefore, I stay a little busy, that’s fine.
Yesterday my husband and I went to see our dear friends My friend is a “sister” in recovery. That means she and I have the same sponsor. In recovery we have a “family” within our groups. If my sponsee has a sponsee, then they are my grandsponsees. If my sister in recovery has sponsees, they are my nieces and so on. My grand sponsor, has the most time of any women in our program, NA. And I mean globally! All these women are a source of strength and help and hope. They show me that I am not alone and we can do this together.
My “sister” that I visited has lung cancer. She is an amazing, incredible, loving, smart, spiritual woman that I look up to and seeing her suffer is excruciating. Her husband is also a man in recovery and he and my husband had the same sponsor, a wonderful, awesome man that also passed from lung cancer a few years ago. Which makes our husbands “brothers” in recovery. They went out to coffee while I visited my friend. She is so beautiful, so strong. And this, cancer… is the bad!
Today, I am watching my super cute, sweet little great grandson while his mommy works at her new job at a prison! And his daddy had to go to school today, he is studying to be an MD. I am so proud of them both. They are all a blessing to me. This is my way of helping my grandson through med school. He is my oldest grand child and has always been a super smart guy and a complete joy in my life. And this… is the good!
But I think the best news of the day is, my son called and said he thinks him and girlfriend have a house they can move into. A cheap little house, but a house! They have been homeless for a couple of months and it was really rough over the holidays. She has two little kids. So far, they have hung in there, they keep going to their new little jobs, no car, no money, nothing. Still, they kept on trying and staying clean. My son took a 60 day chip at the meeting where I gave my husband a 35 year cake. I was kind of amazed. I’ve seen this before, so not overly excited but he’s never had such a nice girlfriend before, so maybe this time it will work for him. And this is good… hopefully!
Well, I think my little angel is waking up, My thought at time is coping with other’s illnesses, Those we love and hold so dearly. Of course, I understand “powerlessness” and letting go and letting God. It doesn’t make it any easier to watch them suffer.
Question of the week: Do you love someone with terminal illness? If so, how do you cope? Do you have chronic or terminal illness? How do you cope with your own?