Blog for June 24th, 2024
Imitation
They say “imitation” is the best form of flattery, and indeed, it could be. However, it can also be a lie. With this whole A.I. (artificial intelligence) going on and photo shopping everything, and all that, we can’t be too sure if what we’re seeing and hearing is really real.
As for me, I personally have tried to emulate my husband’s patience and work ethics. He stays calm and he stays with a task until it’s completed, I thought that was amazing. Because I was all over the place, I’d start one thing and before it was finished, I’d start five more. My mind was always twirling, and I couldn’t keep up with myself. So, I wanted to be more like him in that respect.
I’ve also tried to “imitate” people in recovery who seem to have a spiritual glow about them. They too are usually calm, kind, giving but have healthy boundaries. They tend to put effort into their lives, their jobs, families and spiritual well-being. In the past, especially when I was younger, I tried to “imitate” famous people, rock stars, models and the clothes they wore.
Some of the people I thought were cool that I tried to imitate were not really healthy role models, I tended to think the bad ones were the cool ones. That’s what got me into this mess to begin with. Well, back then anyway.
But there’s another kind of “imitation” that has caught my attention lately. As I said in the beginning, “imitation” is the best form of flattery, but I say, that “flattery” can be breached. It can go a little too far, in fact it can be irritating and painful to have someone kind of steal your life, your ways, your story. I have heard some of my own loved one’s share (speak at a meeting or event) of things that happened to them, but I know for a fact, it was someone else, not them.
I have had friends and others take on my own personal likes and dislikes, and claim them as their own, even after they told me they didn’t like things the same way as me, but later on, they owned it! this may be flattering to some, but it can become annoying. I have a granddaughter who also had a friend like that, she told me all about how her friend would “copy” her in whatever she did. I said “I understand”, I have a friend like that too.
I’m not judging, I’m just asking, don’t people have their own personal likes and dislikes without adopting their friends? I am not saying that it’s like seeing a friend or someone wear a new style or get some kind of new gadget and you really like it so you get one too. That’s fairly normal. In fact, last night at the hot meeting I was in, one of the ladies had a hand held type cooler, she showed it to me and yes, I will be getting one to help me beat the heat in the meetings this summer.
What I’m talking about is almost like identity theft, only, it’s pretty much done right in front of you. I don’t know how they think we don’t notice. I think in the case of my friend, she forgets and has a way of remembering things quite differently.
Also, like I mentioned with the A.I. stuff, I get frustrated with my students turning in work that I know they didn’t really do. I also think it’s a shame that the film industry has started copying famous actors into avatars or something and using them to make movies instead of the real people. I’m afraid the “real thing” is gonna be a thing of the past “real soon”. And that’s not only scary, but it’s also sad. We almost can’t even trust our own eyes anymore with all the fake, photo shopped pictures out there.
I know that the pictures I am in and they put it on Facebook look way better than I really am. But I know several people that do this on purpose, regularly. Then, when you see them in person, you’re like “wow, you’ve aged thirty years since your picture last week”! lol. Again, sad and scary.
Don’t even get me started on the politicians and music industry, so much BS and copying. It seems the only thing I can really count on to be real anymore is my God, my love and my recovery. And I do know of many people that fake their religion and recovery too. But guess what? They can! But we don’t have to.
When you are for real and sincere in your recovery and your faith, you will get the “real” benefits of it all. You will be able to live comfortably in your own skin and have a “real” life of your own to be proud of. I am not saying that I don’t try to “imitate” some people at some level, I looked to experienced members in the program and loving, kind people at church. Especially the ones who seemed tohave good parenting skills. 😊
It’s ok to “imitate” others in certain characteristics, but don’t try to live their program, their recovery or their lives, get your own. It’s there for the taking.
Question of the Week: Who have you “imitated” in your life?
