Disclaimer: I by no means have these spiritual principals down pat. I am a work in progress like everyone else. These are just the principals that our program encourages us to apply in our lives.
As we work the twelve steps in our program, they have some Spiritual Principals within the Step Working Guide and Textbooks. These Principals are not new and the twelve steps did not invent spirituality or principals. They have just put them together in a package (12 steps) that we (addicts & alcoholics) can wrap our minds around and start to incorporate them into our own lives, little by little.
Surrender has to be the first spiritual principle. I wrote on it last week and actually, I have written about most all of the Spiritual Principle at some point in some way. But Surrender has to come first. Until we are ready to give it up, I’m talking about our addictions, we can’t move forward. Throwing in the towel doesn’t necessarily mean we lose, in fact, in this case, it means we win!
I have also found that once we surrender our life of insanity and addictions, we will find that there will be plenty of other times throughout life that we need to surrender. I’ve had to surrender my attitudes, relationships, work, health, loved ones health, kids, grandkids, money, my home and the list goes on and on. But without surrender, we cannot even pretend to be about recovery.
This is only my opinion, sorry about that, but I truly believe the 2nd most important Spiritual Principle I can do is to start practicing Faith. I suppose we must even have a bit of that when we’re ready to surrender. When we are ready to change everything about our lives, we must be thinking there is a better way. And of course there is, but what will take us from a life of addiction to a life of recovery? How will we navigate through recovery? The steps? yes. Sponsors and friends in recovery? Yes.
Faith is defined as “complete trust or confidence in someone or something”. Or, a “strong belief in God or in the doctrines of religion, based on spiritual apprehensions rather than proof”. OK then, that’s what we’re talking about with surrender. Surrender to a thought, a process, a feeling, or to a group or person that seems to have what you ultimately want. I put my faith and trust in the process of the program, which means, the steps and the traditions as well as the suggestions. I.e.– get a sponsor, go to meetings, be of service and work the steps. Within doing these things, I found my real faith. I put my trust and faith in the God of my understanding and life has gotten exponentially better since then. Believing in an entity or a process that you can see, feel or touch takes a lot of faith. The faith will keep growing every time you stretch yourself, step out of yourself and let go and trust your Higher Power, even if you just start with trusting the process.
Honesty, As the saying goes, “to thine own self to true”. I feel that if I am to be true to me, and start being the best me I can be, then honesty in all my affairs is imperative! From cash register honesty to doing my best honest work on my steps. Also, I have to be real and dig deep to get the honest answers, to get to the root of my issues and see what’s really going on, within me. I also need to be as honest as I can be to those around me. That however does not give me a license for “brutal honesty”, of which I have been guilty of, especially when I was newer.
Open Mindedness, I think this one pretty much speaks for itself. You need to keep an open mind to new ideas, to new ways of living and thinking. This can however be a trap. I like to stand by the saying “If you don’t stand for something, you’ll fall for anything”. Just don’t be so open minded that you are lead down some dark and tempting paths.
Willingness, This of course speaks to the fact that if we are not willing to change our lives, our thinking and our actions then we are doomed to stay locked into the life of insanity and pain we knew in addiction. This principal asks us to be willing to change thinking and lives in a much healthier way. Making decisions that are more conducive to prosperity and good health. Staying out of jail and institutions.
Humility, “freedom from pride and arrogance. Lowliness of mind. A modest estimate of one’s own worth. A sense of one’s own unworthiness through imperfection.”
To some, this may sound like you don’t think much of yourself. And this is indeed the point. Many of us get into recovery feeling a sense of inflated ( and false) grandiose feelings that we are somehow the center of the universe and everything revolves around us. Of course, we tend to switch this feeling or thought off and use the “I’m a piece of shit and don’t deserve anything”, martyring mentality. It depends on our moods.
The truth of the fact is, we really lay somewhere in between. We’re neither God nor the worse person of all time ever. We just are. We’re us. And that, is awesome. We need to get a sense of our place in the world, in our fellowship, in our community and in our homes with our own family and friends. Not all puffed up and prideful and not self-deprivation either. We have every opportunity to be us, to be the best me I can be. It’s that simple.
Acceptance, I think this too is self-explanatory. My sponsor told me early on in recovery, “you can either accept it or reject it”. That can apply to just about anything. We can change our environment, unless we’re in jail. We can change our minds and attitudes. We can quit a job, leave a relationship, we get to choose. If you’ve been following the political world lately then you know we will have to make a decision to accept whoever is elected, like it or not. We could reject the decision I suppose by moving to another country, but good luck finding something better.
Commitment, this is something I was never good at in my addiction. It took being of service in small doses in recovery to start being a person you could trust and believe to be where I said I’d be and do what I said I’d do. Eventually, I even turned into a person that showed up to work on time, everyday (except when really sick) and do the work I was hired to do. I have also kept commitments to my husband, kids, courts, friends, churches, community and sponsees. This blogging is a commitment I made a year ago. So far, so good! 😊
Perseverance, Well, if you’re gonna make a commitment, I hope you stick with it. Especially my personal commitment to my own recovery. I must tend to that first so that all other commitments can be kept. Strong with will and perseverance as the poem goes, just means sticking to it. I call it “sticktoitivess”. Staying with it, to thine own self be true!
Self-Acceptance, Again, this is pretty obvious meaning. It doesn’t come our first week clean and in recovery, but if we keep up all these other principles and working a program, it will come. Again, “to thine own self be true”. I think having and understanding humility is very important in self-acceptance. I am no better and no less than anyone else. There is a God and I’m not him. I’m just me, doing the best I can in my little corner of the world. Trying to serve and give back as best I can. When I do these things, I am complete, I am happy within myself. I have come to care for myself and take good care of me too. Sleep & eat well and do what doctors tell me. Plus, my spiritual health, which involves these principals.
These are just some of the Spiritual Principles that have been pointed out and mentioned in our step working guide. There are many Spiritual Principals. Some more of the obvious are compassion, forgiveness, giving, sharing, caring. I would like to add: laughter, nurturing a relationship, talking to someone who is hurting, playing with children and giving them our time. Gratitude, selflessness, integrity. Reaching out, sharing our experience, strength, and hope. Encouragement! I like that one a lot. It is listed as a “gift” in the bible and I try to be an encourager to the best of my ability to those who need it and face it, we all need it right? I know there are more and you add some too, please do. But I was saving the best for last, because the greatest of these is LOVE.
Question of the Week: Which Spiritual Principles do you most often use? What other Spiritual Principles can you share with us here?
