Blog for February 21st, 2022
Why ask Why?
Being clean for me also means being of service. Giving back what was so freely given to me. Yet, sometimes being of service comes with a bit of conflict. It’s not always cut and dried, not always so easy to get the job done with so many other personalities vying for their will and/or ideas to be played out. Try as we may to do “God’s Will” and what’s best for the newcomer, we tend to get in our own way and make simple things way more complicated.
I find this to be true in all facets of life. From service works to family life to working the jobs we get paid for and dealing with friends, sponsees and neighbors. For instance, I have a new neighbor across the street. Actually, she is the mother of the guy who use to live there with his family, and they moved away to another state and now his mom needed a place to live so there she is. They had a big mess of limbs, trash, piles of leaves and junk in front of the house on the curb and have left it there for the last three or more months. She sits outside in her front yard a lot to smoke, but cannot see the mess. She knows it’s there, but she really doesn’t have to look at it. We do!
So, I got tired of looking at her mess when I sit in my front yard, which I love to do on nice evenings, I have to stare straight at it. So, I started cleaning it up. It’s almost all cleaned up now. It’s like my mom always said, “if you want something done right, do it yourself.” Plus, I have been taught in my program to be of service where I can. She couldn’t or wouldn’t do it and kept talking about someone was gonna come get it, but it never happened.
As I try to navigate my own life, I find I get involved with my service works, neighbors, grandson’s schooling and other people and things outside of myself. Why? Well, that’s a good question. When I called one of the other service members on the committee I serve on to discuss the wishes of those I serve locally, he said “why?” He wanted to know why would we want to do that? I said, I think they think it’s the right thing to do. But, it’s not really. He and I know that, he’s an expert, so, I believe him. But people get things set in their head and I am only a trusted servant. He said it wouldn’t really hurt anything, but it’s time, money and effort that is not necessary.
So, at what point does a trusted servant, a grandma/guardian, a wife, a sponsor, a friend let go of these outside issues and start asking “why”? I’m starting to ask instead, why do I do this? Why don’t I spend more time on me instead? Or, do I? Is cleaning the neighbors trash up helping her or me more? I was the one bothered with it and the one who had to look at it all the time. Why did I take my son’s girlfriend and go to my grandson’s school for us to learn how to check his computer for undone schoolwork and how to help him? It’s his education and I seem to care about it way more than he does. Why do I bother with it? Because I’m his guardian and I want him to succeed and pass this year’s grade.
Why am I on a couple of committees in my twelve step program? Because I want to give back and believe, when there’s not a pushy chick pushing her will on me, I enjoy it. I enjoy carrying the message to the newcomers. That’s why I do this blog also. Why do I continue to work a part time job even though I am retired? Again, I enjoy it, I enjoy the interaction with my students. And a little extra money in retirement doesn’t hurt either.
Why do I worry about getting my house in order and all the property around us? Because I enjoy sitting in a clean house, writing and being with my husband and people. The list goes on and on and I know you all have these lists too. But I would suggest sitting down and checking that out. Maybe you too will find there is indeed a personal pay off for you. Whether it’s living in a clean neighborhood and house, or helping others get and stay clean and find a new way to live.
Or the joy and pride I’ll feel when this boy graduates from high school and grows up to the man God intends for him to be. There are many reasons to do what we do, taking a spot check inventory and making sure we are doing it for the right reasons after we ask “why”? Will help me to continue my chosen path and doing the best I can with it. I sure don’t do it alone, but I still do say “Why ask Why?” and “Why me Lord”? lol, I bet He’s tired of hearing that from me.
Question of the Week: What did you find out when you ask Why?