It’s not uncommon for us addicts to lose all kinds of “privileges” when we’re out there running amuck using and abusing. Like, losing a driver’s license. Or worse yet, the privilege of seeing our own kids. Or the privilege of walking around, going wherever we want, aka being locked up! We also stand to lose our health, maybe a limb or the ability to function on our own in society.
If you have ever lost any or all of those privileges then you know what I mean. The problem is, most of us think of these things as our God given right! But obviously, that’s not true. We can easily lose our freedom when we drive drunk and/or loaded and perhaps get in an accident and hurt or kill others or cause a life time of sustained injury to ourselves or others. We do not have a right to even take a chance on that happening. Yet, many of us, (myself included) thought that we should be allowed to drive whenever we wanted, no matter our state of mind.
Many people, unfortunately think it’s their right to hurt their kids, their families, the people they love. Spouting, “it’s my family, I’ll do what I want”. Again, that couldn’t be further from the truth. No one has the “right” to hurt anyone! Especially a child, it is not your right. Having children is privilege and an honor.
This list of taking advantage of our situations and using and abusing it for some sort of personal gain or need can be quite extensive, just thinking about how people abuse their privileges at work I could write a book.
There are also the people that are born into privilege. They have to know what it’s like to struggle and work for ordinary things, like food, a house, a car, kid’s clothes and needs, and all those fun things we like. You know computers, TV’s, smart phones, nice clothes etc. I have no idea what being born with a silver spoon in my mouth is like or parents who pay my way out of the trouble I get into or pay my way into fancy colleges, clubs and prestigious jobs. And guess what? It doesn’t matter, I am not talking about that kind of privilege.
However, with all that said, I really wanted to focus more on what it’s like when we actually lose these privileges and come to terms with the fact that we’re not quite as big and bad as we thought. When we realize I am not the only one in the universe and that I just can’t plow through life treating people with distain and abuse. Disregarding their needs or feelings. Remember that song, “If you lose me baby, you lose your good thing.”?
Exactly, you can lose your good thing with just one bad decision, one stupid move, one dumb comment. Your “good thing” can be your job, your car, your house, your relationship, your recovery! In the case of my grandson this week, it was his PS4. Ha! He made a not so good move talking back to me one too many times the other day and then saying “blah, blah, blah” when I was talking. He’s not liking the losing of his “good thing”. But believe, this kid is way smarter than his parents ever were and he’s just eleven. We talked about it and it realizes how rude and disrespectful he was. I know this isn’t like world crisis level stuff, but my goal is for him to know that it’s not ok to go through life being so arrogant, rude, condescending and disrespectful. I would really hate to see him behaving like that as a grown man. Yet, I see many grown men and women acting like that everywhere I turn.
I know too well what it’s like to lose a dearly coveted privilege, I don’t like it anymore than the kid does. Plus, I love my freedom, I love my family and friends. I love driving my car, in fact today, I took the charger for a spin, whoo hoo! I like it. I want to do what I want to do when I want to do it. However, not at the expense of other people’s safety, feelings or needs. We need to learn to work within the bounds of what’s right for us and them. Even the people we’ve never met. Like the ones that the drunk guy ran into with his car and wiped out a family, people he’d never met. He figured he was more important than them, that’s why it was ok for him to get wasted and take off driving.
See, there’s all kinds of ways to be selfish and self-centered and not even know what we’re doing, thinking, it’s our privilege. I tell you what is my privilege: My privilege is to love, care and serve others. To take care of the people I love and be there for them. It’s my privilege to worship at my church, be in recovery and pursue my dreams and goals, which I have done in recovery. God has been good to me, because it is His privilege to honor and bless his kids, same as I try to honor and bless my kids.
Question of the Week: Have you ever lost a privilege? How did that feel? Do you feel privileged now? Or is that just for the rich people?
